Questions
If yours is not here, just ask.
A Robin Appears
Small. Steady. Unafraid.
It doesn't fix the ache.
It doesn't change what's missing.
But for a moment, it feels like a
whisper from somewhere softer:
“I'm still with you.
In the morning light.
In the stillness.
In the love that never left.”
And somehow, that is enough to
breathe again.
Visits
What happens on a visit?
I wash the headstone by hand, clear weeds, leaves and anything that has blown onto the plot, take away wilted flowers and old pots, clip the grass around the grave and place fresh flowers. Then I take photographs and send them to you, so you can see the grave exactly as I left it.
Do I need to be there?
No. Most of the families I work for live too far away to visit as often as they would like, and some live abroad. You tell me where the grave is, I do the rest and the photographs come to you the same day.
How do you find the grave?
Send me the cemetery and, if you have it, the section and plot number from the deed or the cemetery office. A photograph of the headstone helps too. If you are not sure, tell me what you do know and I will find it.
Can you visit on a particular date?
Yes. Birthdays, anniversaries, Mother's Day, Father's Day and Christmas are the days families ask for most. Tell me the date when you book and I will arrange the visit for it, or for the day before so everything is ready.
Can you bring a particular flower?
Often, yes. Tell me what they loved and I will do my best, but it depends on the season and on what the florists have that week. If it cannot be found I will choose something close and tell you.
Plans and prices
How often should the grave be visited?
Most families find four to six visits a year works best, though seasonal weather can mean more frequent care: rain, frost, fallen leaves, moss and bird droppings change the look of a grave within a few weeks. A grave with a kerb set and gravel needs less than a lawn grave that grows over in summer. If you are not sure, start with one visit and we will decide together.
How much does it cost?
Monthly visits are £35 to £45 each, bi-monthly visits £45 to £55, quarterly visits from £55 and a six-monthly or annual visit £60 to £70. Prices depend on the size of the headstone and how much care it needs; I give you a quote before any work begins. Fresh flowers are included in every visit.
How do I pay?
By bank transfer. There is no contract: you can book a one-off visit or regular visits, and change your mind whenever you like.
Can I change or stop the visits?
Yes, at any time. Just tell me. A plan is a promise that I will come, not a tie-in.
Can I arrange visits as a gift for someone?
Yes. A visit with fresh flowers on a birthday or at Christmas is a thoughtful present for a relative who cannot get to the grave themselves, and the photographs can go to them or to you.
Headstones
How do you clean a headstone?
Gently. Water, a soft brush and patience, never a pressure washer or harsh chemicals, which can damage the stone and the lettering. Marble, granite, sandstone and slate all need a slightly different touch and I treat each one accordingly.
The headstone is very weathered. Can it be restored?
Years of lichen and grime come away with careful cleaning and the difference is usually remarkable, though it is not always instant: a stone that has been left for a long time can need more than one application, and sometimes a second visit, before it comes up well. Re-cutting or re-gilding lettering, re-fixing a leaning stone or repairing damage is a stonemason's work, and I will tell you honestly if that is what is needed.
What happens to the old flowers and pots?
I take them away and dispose of them properly. Vases and holders that belong to the grave stay, cleaned.
Still wondering?
Message or email and I will answer honestly, including when the answer is that you need a stonemason rather than me.